by
E F Benson
It is probable that everybody who is
at all a constant dreamer has had at least one experience of an event or a
sequence of circumstances which have come to his mind in sleep being
subsequently realized in the material world. But, in my opinion, so far from this
being a strange thing, it would be far odder if this fulfilment did not
occasionally happen, since our dreams are, as a rule, concerned with people
whom we know and places with which we are familiar, such as might very
naturally occur in the awake and daylit world. True, these dreams are often
broken into by some absurd and fantastic incident, which puts them out of court
in regard to their subsequent fulfilment, but on the mere calculation of
chances, it does not appear in the least unlikely that a dream imagined by
anyone who dreams constantly should occasionally come true. Not long ago, for
instance, I experienced such a fulfilment of a dream which seems to me in no
way remarkable and to have no kind of psychical significance. The manner of it
was as follows.
A certain friend of mine, living abroad, is amiable enough
to write to me about once in a fortnight. Thus, when fourteen days or
thereabouts have elapsed since I last heard from him, my mind, probably, either
consciously or subconsciously, is expectant of a letter from him. One night
last week I dreamed that as I was going upstairs to dress for dinner I heard,
as I often heard, the sound of the postman's knock on my front door, and
diverted my direction downstairs instead. There, among other correspondence,
was a letter from him. Thereafter the fantastic entered, for on opening it I
found inside the ace of diamonds, and scribbled across it in his well-known
handwriting, ‘I am sending you this for safe custody, as you know it is running
an unreasonable risk to keep aces in Italy.’ The next evening I was just
preparing to go upstairs to dress when I heard the postman's knock, and did
precisely as I had done in my dream. There, among other letters, was one from
my friend. Only it did not contain the ace of diamonds. Had it done so, I
should have attached more weight to the matter, which, as it stands, seems to
me a perfectly ordinary coincidence. No doubt I consciously or subconsciously
expected a letter from him, and this suggested to me my dream. Similarly, the
fact that my friend had not written to me for a fortnight suggested to him that
he should do so. But occasionally it is not so easy to find such an
explanation, and for the following story I can find no explanation at all. It
came out of the dark, and into the dark it has gone again.
All my life I have been a habitual dreamer: the nights are
few, that is to say, when I do not find on awaking in the morning that some
mental experience has been mine, and sometimes, all night long, apparently, a
series of the most dazzling adventures befall me. Almost without exception
these adventures are pleasant, though often merely trivial. It is of an
exception that I am going to speak.
It was when I was about sixteen that a certain dream first
came to me, and this is how it befell. It opened with my being set down at the
door of a big red-brick house, where, I understood, I was going to stay. The
servant who opened the door told me that tea was being served in the garden,
and led me through a low dark-panelled hall, with a large open fireplace, on to
a cheerful green lawn set round with flower beds. There were grouped about the
tea-table a small party of people, but they were all strangers to me except
one, who was a schoolfellow called Jack Stone, clearly the son of the house,
and he introduced me to his mother and father and a couple of sisters. I was, I
remember, somewhat astonished to find myself here, for the boy in question was
scarcely known to me, and I rather disliked what I knew of him; moreover, he
had left school nearly a year before. The afternoon was very hot, and an
intolerable oppression reigned. On the far side of the lawn ran a red-brick
wall, with an iron gate in its centre, outside which stood a walnut tree. We
sat in the shadow of the house opposite a row of long windows, inside which I
could see a table with cloth laid, glimmering with glass and silver. This
garden front of the house was very long, and at one end of it stood a tower of
three stories, which looked to me much older than the rest of the building.
Before long, Mrs. Stone, who, like the rest of the party,
had sat in absolute silence, said to me, ‘Jack will show you your room: I have
given you the room in the tower.’
Quite inexplicably my heart sank at her words. I felt as
if I had known that I should have the room in the tower, and that it contained
something dreadful and significant. Jack instantly got up, and I understood
that I had to follow him. In silence we passed through the hall, and mounted a
great oak staircase with many corners, and arrived at a small landing with two
doors set in it. He pushed one of these open for me to enter, and without
coming in himself, closed it after me. Then I knew that my conjecture had been
right: there was something awful in the room, and with the terror of nightmare
growing swiftly and enveloping me, I awoke in a spasm of terror.
Now that dream or variations on it occurred to me
intermittently for fifteen years. Most often it came in exactly this form, the
arrival, the tea laid out on the lawn, the deadly silence succeeded by that one
deadly sentence, the mounting with Jack Stone up to the room in the tower where
horror dwelt, and it always came to a close in the nightmare of terror at that
which was in the room, though I never saw what it was. At other times I
experienced variations on this same theme. Occasionally, for instance, we would
be sitting at dinner in the dining-room, into the windows of which I had looked
on the first night when the dream of this house visited me, but wherever we
were, there was the same silence, the same sense of dreadful oppression and
foreboding. And the silence I knew would always be broken by Mrs. Stone saying
to me, ‘Jack will show you your room: I have given you the room in the tower.’
Upon which (this was invariable) I had to follow him up the oak staircase with
many corners, and enter the place that I dreaded more and more each time that I
visited it in sleep. Or, again, I would find myself playing cards still in
silence in a drawing-room lit with immense chandeliers, that gave a blinding
illumination. What the game was I have no idea; what I remember, with a sense
of miserable anticipation, was that soon Mrs. Stone would get up and say to me,
‘Jack will show you your room: I have given you the room in the tower.’ This
drawing-room where we played cards was next to the dining-room, and, as I have
said, was always brilliantly illuminated, whereas the rest of the house was
full of dusk and shadows. And yet, how often, in spite of those bouquets of
lights, have I not pored over the cards that were dealt me, scarcely able for
some reason to see them. Their designs, too, were strange: there were no red
suits, but all were black, and among them there were certain cards which were
black all over. I hated and dreaded those.
As this dream continued to recur, I got to know the
greater part of the house. There was a smoking-room beyond the drawing-room, at
the end of a passage with a green baize door. It was always very dark there,
and as often as I went there I passed somebody whom I could not see in the
doorway coming out. Curious developments, too, took place in the characters
that peopled the dream as might happen to living persons. Mrs. Stone, for
instance, who, when I first saw her, had been black-haired, became grey, and instead
of rising briskly, as she had done at first when she said, ‘Jack will show you
your room: I have given you the room in the tower,’ got up very feebly, as if
the strength was leaving her limbs. Jack also grew up, and became a rather
ill-looking young man, with a brown moustache, while one of the sisters ceased
to appear, and I understood she was married.
Then it so happened that I was not visited by this dream
for six months or more, and I began to hope, in such inexplicable dread did I
hold it, that it had passed away for good. But one night after this interval I
again found myself being shown out onto the lawn for tea, and Mrs. Stone was
not there, while the others were all dressed in black. At once I guessed the
reason, and my heart leaped at the thought that perhaps this time I should not
have to sleep in the room in the tower, and though we usually all sat in
silence, on this occasion the sense of relief made me talk and laugh as I had
never yet done. But even then matters were not altogether comfortable, for no
one else spoke, but they all looked secretly at each other. And soon the
foolish stream of my talk ran dry, and gradually an apprehension worse than
anything I had previously known gained on me as the light slowly faded.
Suddenly a voice which I knew well broke the stillness,
the voice of Mrs. Stone, saying, ‘Jack will show you your room: I have given
you the room in the tower.’ It seemed to come from near the gate in the
red-brick wall that bounded the lawn, and looking up, I saw that the grass
outside was sown thick with gravestones. A curious greyish light shone from
them, and I could read the lettering on the grave nearest me, and it was, ‘In
evil memory of Julia Stone.’ And as usual Jack got up, and again I followed him
through the hall and up the staircase with many corners. On this occasion it
was darker than usual, and when I passed into the room in the tower I could
only just see the furniture, the position of which was already familiar to me.
Also there was a dreadful odour of decay in the room, and I woke screaming.
The dream, with such variations and developments as I have
mentioned, went on at intervals for fifteen years. Sometimes I would dream it
two or three nights in succession; once, as I have said, there was an
intermission of six months, but taking a reasonable average, I should say that
I dreamed it quite as often as once in a month. It had, as is plain, something
of nightmare about it, since it always ended in the same appalling terror,
which so far from getting less, seemed to me to gather fresh fear every time
that I experienced it. There was, too, a strange and dreadful consistency about
it. The characters in it, as I have mentioned, got regularly older, death and
marriage visited this silent family, and I never in the dream, after Mrs. Stone
had died, set eyes on her again. But it was always her voice that told me that
the room in the tower was prepared for me, and whether we had tea out on the
lawn, or the scene was laid in one of the rooms overlooking it, I could always
see her gravestone standing just outside the iron gate. It was the same, too,
with the married daughter; usually she was not present, but once or twice she
returned again, in company with a man, whom I took to be her husband. He, too,
like the rest of them, was always silent. But, owing to the constant repetition
of the dream, I had ceased to attach, in my waking hours, any significance to
it. I never met Jack Stone again during all those years, nor did I ever see a
house that resembled this dark house of my dream. And then something happened.
I had been in London in this year, up till the end of the
July, and during the first week in August went down to stay with a friend in a
house he had taken for the summer months, in the Ashdown Forest district of
Sussex. I left London early, for John Clinton was to meet me at Forest Row
Station, and we were going to spend the day golfing, and go to his house in the
evening. He had his motor with him, and we set off, about five of the
afternoon, after a thoroughly delightful day, for the drive, the distance being
some ten miles. As it was still so early we did not have tea at the club house,
but waited till we should get home. As we drove, the weather, which up till
then had been, though hot, deliciously fresh, seemed to me to alter in quality,
and become very stagnant and oppressive, and I felt that indefinable sense of
ominous apprehension that I am accustomed to before thunder. John, however, did
not share my views, attributing my loss of lightness to the fact that I had
lost both my matches. Events proved, however, that I was right, though I do not
think that the thunderstorm that broke that night was the sole cause of my
depression.
Our way lay through deep high-banked lanes, and before we
had gone very far I fell asleep, and was only awakened by the stopping of the
motor. And with a sudden thrill, partly of fear but chiefly of curiosity, I
found myself standing in the doorway of my house of dream. We went, I half
wondering whether or not I was dreaming still, through a low oak-panelled hall,
and out onto the lawn, where tea was laid in the shadow of the house. It was
set in flower beds, a red-brick wall, with a gate in it, bounded one side, and
out beyond that was a space of rough grass with a walnut tree. The façade of
the house was very long, and at one end stood a three-storied tower, markedly
older than the rest.
Here for the moment all resemblance to the repeated dream
ceased. There was no silent and somehow terrible family, but a large assembly
of exceedingly cheerful persons, all of whom were known to me. And in spite of
the horror with which the dream itself had always filled me, I felt nothing of
it now that the scene of it was thus reproduced before me. But I felt intensest
curiosity as to what was going to happen.
Tea pursued its cheerful course, and before long Mrs.
Clinton got up. And at that moment I think I knew what she was going to say.
She spoke to me, and what she said was:
‘Jack will show you your room: I have given you the room
in the tower.’
At that, for half a second, the horror of the dream took
hold of me again. But it quickly passed, and again I felt nothing more than the
most intense curiosity. It was not very long before it was amply satisfied.
John turned to me.
‘Right up at the top of the house,’ he said, ‘but I think
you'll be comfortable. We're absolutely full up. Would you like to go and see
it now? By Jove, I believe that you are right, and that we are going to have a
thunderstorm. How dark it has become.’
I got up and followed him. We passed through the hall, and
up the perfectly familiar staircase. Then he opened the door, and I went in.
And at that moment sheer unreasoning terror again possessed me. I did not know
what I feared: I simply feared. Then like a sudden recollection, when one remembers
a name which has long escaped the memory, I knew what I feared. I feared Mrs.
Stone, whose grave with the sinister inscription, ‘In evil memory,’ I had so
often seen in my dream, just beyond the lawn which lay below my window. And
then once more the fear passed so completely that I wondered what there was to
fear, and I found myself, sober and quiet and sane, in the room in the tower,
the name of which I had so often heard in my dream, and the scene of which was
so familiar.
I looked around it with a certain sense of proprietorship,
and found that nothing had been changed from the dreaming nights in which I
knew it so well. Just to the left of the door was the bed, lengthways along the
wall, with the head of it in the angle. In a line with it was the fireplace and
a small bookcase; opposite the door the outer wall was pierced by two
lattice-paned windows, between which stood the dressing-table, while ranged
along the fourth wall was the washing-stand and a big cupboard. My luggage had
already been unpacked, for the furniture of dressing and undressing lay orderly
on the wash-stand and toilet-table, while my dinner clothes were spread out on
the coverlet of the bed. And then, with a sudden start of unexplained dismay, I
saw that there were two rather conspicuous objects which I had not seen before
in my dreams: one a life-sized oil painting of Mrs. Stone, the other a
black-and-white sketch of Jack Stone, representing him as he had appeared to me
only a week before in the last of the series of these repeated dreams, a rather
secret and evil-looking man of about thirty. His picture hung between the
windows, looking straight across the room to the other portrait, which hung at
the side of the bed. At that I looked next, and as I looked I felt once more the
horror of nightmare seize me.
It represented Mrs. Stone as I had seen her last in my
dreams: old and withered and white-haired. But in spite of the evident
feebleness of body, a dreadful exuberance and vitality shone through the
envelope of flesh, an exuberance wholly malign, a vitality that foamed and
frothed with unimaginable evil. Evil beamed from the narrow, leering eyes; it
laughed in the demon-like mouth. The whole face was instinct with some secret
and appalling mirth; the hands, clasped together on the knee, seemed shaking
with suppressed and nameless glee. Then I saw also that it was signed in the
left-hand bottom corner, and wondering who the artist could be, I looked more
closely, and read the inscription, ‘Julia Stone by Julia Stone.’
There came a tap at the door, and John Clinton entered.
‘Got everything you want?’ he asked.
‘Rather more than I want,’ said I, pointing to the
picture.
He laughed.
‘Hard-featured old lady,’ he said. ‘By herself, too, I
remember. Anyhow she can't have flattered herself much.’
‘But don't you see?’ said I. ‘It's scarcely a human face
at all. It's the face of some witch, of some devil.’
He looked at it more closely.
‘Yes; it isn't very pleasant,’ he said. ‘Scarcely a
bedside manner, eh? Yes; I can imagine getting the nightmare if I went to sleep
with that close by my bed. I'll have it taken down if you like.’
‘I really wish you would,’ I said.
He rang the bell, and with the help of a servant we
detached the picture and carried it out onto the landing, and put it with its
face to the wall.
‘By Jove, the old lady is a weight,’ said John, mopping
his forehead. ‘I wonder if she had something on her mind.’
The extraordinary weight of the picture had struck me too.
I was about to reply, when I caught sight of my own hand. There was blood on
it, in considerable quantities, covering the whole palm.
‘I've cut myself somehow,’ said I.
John gave a little startled exclamation.
‘Why, I have too,’ he said.
Simultaneously the footman took out his handkerchief and
wiped his hand with it. I saw that there was blood also on his handkerchief.
John and I went back into the tower room and washed the
blood off; but neither on his hand nor on mine was there the slightest trace of
a scratch or cut. It seemed to me that, having ascertained this, we both, by a
sort of tacit consent, did not allude to it again. Something in my case had
dimly occurred to me that I did not wish to think about. It was but a
conjecture, but I fancied that I knew the same thing had occurred to him.
The heat and oppression of the air, for the storm we had
expected was still undischarged, increased very much after dinner, and for some
time most of the party, among whom were John Clinton and myself, sat outside on
the path bounding the lawn, where we had had tea. The night was absolutely
dark, and no twinkle of star or moon ray could penetrate the pall of cloud that
overset the sky. By degrees our assembly thinned, the women went up to bed, men
dispersed to the smoking or billiard room, and by eleven o'clock my host and I
were the only two left. All the evening I thought that he had something on his
mind, and as soon as we were alone he spoke.
‘The man who helped us with the picture had blood on his
hand, too, did you notice?’ he said. ‘I asked him just now if he had cut
himself, and he said he supposed he had, but that he could find no mark of it.
Now where did that blood come from?’
By dint of telling myself that I was not going to think
about it, I had succeeded in not doing so, and I did not want, especially just
at bedtime, to be reminded of it.
‘I don't know,’ said I, ‘and I don't really care so long
as the picture of Mrs. Stone is not by my bed.’
He got up.
‘But it's odd,’ he said. ‘Ha! Now you'll see another odd
thing.’
A dog of his, an Irish terrier by breed, had come out of
the house as we talked. The door behind us into the hall was open, and a bright
oblong of light shone across the lawn to the iron gate which led on to the
rough grass outside, where the walnut tree stood. I saw that the dog had all
his hackles up, bristling with rage and fright; his lips were curled back from
his teeth, as if he was ready to spring at something, and he was growling to
himself. He took not the slightest notice of his master or me, but stiffly and
tensely walked across the grass to the iron gate. There he stood for a moment,
looking through the bars and still growling. Then of a sudden his courage
seemed to desert him: he gave one long howl, and scuttled back to the house
with a curious crouching sort of movement.
‘He does that half-a-dozen times a day.’ said John. ‘He
sees something which he both hates and fears.’
I walked to the gate and looked over it. Something was
moving on the grass outside, and soon a sound which I could not instantly
identify came to my ears. Then I remembered what it was: it was the purring of
a cat. I lit a match, and saw the purrer, a big blue Persian, walking round and
round in a little circle just outside the gate, stepping high and ecstatically,
with tail carried aloft like a banner. Its eyes were bright and shining, and
every now and then it put its head down and sniffed at the grass.
I laughed.
‘The end of that mystery, I am afraid.’ I said. ‘Here's a
large cat having Walpurgis night all alone.’
‘Yes, that's Darius,’ said John. ‘He spends half the day
and all night there. But that's not the end of the dog mystery, for Toby and he
are the best of friends, but the beginning of the cat mystery. What's the cat doing
there? And why is Darius pleased, while Toby is terror-stricken?’
At that moment I remembered the rather horrible detail of
my dreams when I saw through the gate, just where the cat was now, the white
tombstone with the sinister inscription. But before I could answer the rain
began, as suddenly and heavily as if a tap had been turned on, and
simultaneously the big cat squeezed through the bars of the gate, and came
leaping across the lawn to the house for shelter. Then it sat in the doorway,
looking out eagerly into the dark. It spat and struck at John with its paw, as
he pushed it in, in order to close the door.
Somehow, with the portrait of Julia Stone in the passage
outside, the room in the tower had absolutely no alarm for me, and as I went to
bed, feeling very sleepy and heavy, I had nothing more than interest for the
curious incident about our bleeding hands, and the conduct of the cat and dog.
The last thing I looked at before I put out my light was the square empty space
by my bed where the portrait had been. Here the paper was of its original full
tint of dark red: over the rest of the walls it had faded. Then I blew out my
candle and instantly fell asleep.
My awaking was equally instantaneous, and I sat bolt
upright in bed under the impression that some bright light had been flashed in
my face, though it was now absolutely pitch dark. I knew exactly where I was,
in the room which I had dreaded in dreams, but no horror that I ever felt when
asleep approached the fear that now invaded and froze my brain. Immediately
after a peal of thunder crackled just above the house, but the probability that
it was only a flash of lightning which awoke me gave no reassurance to my
galloping heart. Something I knew was in the room with me, and instinctively I
put out my right hand, which was nearest the wall, to keep it away. And my hand
touched the edge of a picture-frame hanging close to me.
I sprang out of bed, upsetting the small table that stood
by it, and I heard my watch, candle, and matches clatter onto the floor. But
for the moment there was no need of light, for a blinding flash leaped out of
the clouds, and showed me that by my bed again hung the picture of Mrs. Stone.
And instantly the room went into blackness again. But in that flash I saw
another thing also, namely a figure that leaned over the end of my bed,
watching me. It was dressed in some close-clinging white garment, spotted and
stained with mould, and the face was that of the portrait.
Overhead the thunder cracked and roared, and when it
ceased and the deathly stillness succeeded, I heard the rustle of movement
coming nearer me, and, more horrible yet, perceived an odour of corruption and
decay. And then a hand was laid on the side of my neck, and close beside my ear
I heard quick-taken, eager breathing. Yet I knew that this thing, though it
could be perceived by touch, by smell, by eye and by ear, was still not of this
earth, but something that had passed out of the body and had power to make
itself manifest. Then a voice, already familiar to me, spoke.
‘I knew you would come to the room in the tower,’ it said.
‘I have been long waiting for you. At last you have come. Tonight I shall
feast; before long we will feast together.’
And the quick breathing came closer to me; I could feel it
on my neck.
At that the terror, which I think had paralyzed me for the
moment, gave way to the wild instinct of self-preservation. I hit wildly with
both arms, kicking out at the same moment, and heard a little animal-squeal,
and something soft dropped with a thud beside me. I took a couple of steps
forward, nearly tripping up over whatever it was that lay there, and by the
merest good-luck found the handle of the door. In another second I ran out on
the landing, and had banged the door behind me. Almost at the same moment I
heard a door open somewhere below, and John Clinton, candle in hand, came
running upstairs.
‘What is it?’ he said. ‘I sleep just below you, and heard
a noise as if—Good heavens, there's blood on your shoulder.’
I stood there, so he told me afterwards, swaying from side
to side, white as a sheet, with the mark on my shoulder as if a hand covered
with blood had been laid there.
‘It's in there,’ I said, pointing. ‘She, you know. The
portrait is in there, too, hanging up on the place we took it from.’
At that he laughed.
‘My dear fellow, this is mere nightmare,’ he said.
He pushed by me, and opened the door, I standing there
simply inert with terror, unable to stop him, unable to move.
‘Phew! What an awful smell,’ he said.
Then there was silence; he had passed out of my sight
behind the open door. Next moment he came out again, as white as myself, and
instantly shut it.
‘Yes, the portrait's there,’ he said, ‘and on the floor is
a thing—a thing spotted with earth, like what they bury people in. Come away,
quick, come away.’
How I got downstairs I hardly know. An awful shuddering
and nausea of the spirit rather than of the flesh had seized me, and more than
once he had to place my feet upon the steps, while every now and then he cast
glances of terror and apprehension up the stairs. But in time we came to his
dressing-room on the floor below, and there I told him what I have here described.
The sequel can be made short; indeed, some of my readers
have perhaps already guessed what it was, if they remember that inexplicable
affair of the churchyard at West Fawley, some eight years ago, where an attempt
was made three times to bury the body of a certain woman who had committed
suicide. On each occasion the coffin was found in the course of a few days
again protruding from the ground. After the third attempt, in order that the
thing should not be talked about, the body was buried elsewhere in unconsecrated
ground. Where it was buried was just outside the iron gate of the garden
belonging to the house where this woman had lived. She had committed suicide in
a room at the top of the tower in that house. Her name was Julia Stone.
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